Isla De Cozumel
Waves of bittersweet nostalgia wash over me every time a certain song plays, or even with the simple act of spraying the vanilla-infused perfume I wore with you. The moon, an anchor of our memories together, when we watched its reflection glisten over the ocean in the still of the night, entrancing and hypnotic.
Experiencing my birthday with you, realising we would never be as young as we were in that moment again, celebrating life on a damp, sandy towel where we lay together on a creaky wooden pier stretched out over the blue depths. We confessed our feelings for each other, knowing they could only last so long, recognising that what we had and how we felt would soon fade into a memory that lives only in our minds. An act of my past self communicating to my present self in this illusion of time.
Laughing and running through golden sands, our bodies sun kissed and tanned, my freckles scattered across my face as you tried to count them, my eyes and hair lightening with the sun and warmth which I felt in my body again after feeling so cold for so long. Swimming together and feeling part of the ocean, part of the universe’s flow, trusting that everything is unfolding exactly as it’s meant to. We dreamed of a life unspent working it away or seeking dopamine on tiny screens and in unhealthy ways. This was raw dopamine, it was a slice of heaven.
I remember it all so vividly, though our time together was brief. I’ve never felt so seen; not any act I put on, not for my looks, not lusted over or objectified, which I am so used to, but genuinely understood. We only knew each other long enough to see our best sides, and I like to think that it was meant to work out that way. If we could’ve lasted, we’d have to return to normalcy and reality together, and I can’t fathom the thought of tarnishing what we had or how we saw each other.
You taught me what love is, even if our connection was short-lived. I wanted nothing more than to understand you, to touch you, to run my nails through your tousled beach hair, to make you feel safe like I did with you. Your fingers traced my skin, showing me that it’s okay to trust, to let my guard down. Our lips collided for hours, looking into each other’s eyes and smiling because we saw beyond our physical bodies. Having sex without it being an act of lust or greed, our bodies intertwined like the ropes supporting the hammock beneath us, coming to rest beneath the starry sky, finding shapes in the stars together and searching for meaning in the absurdity of being alive.
- This is my creative writing piece that recalls my time in Mexico, it explores how the connection that I had affected me and it illustrates the intimacy that we shared. It’s honest and from the heart, something I felt truly passionate about writing. I aimed to be as descriptive as possible, expressing the very visual memories that I have through words.
